I had my follow up appointment after my CT scan of my chest. I have a tumor, just bigger than a golf ball in my upper chest. The doctor said that it doesn't appear to be cancer- but I am going to have to have surgery to have it removed and biopsied. Next week I'm going to have a MRI to see some more details and see how it is interacting or entangled with surrounding nerves (since it is close to my spine). Then I will find a neurosurgeon and get it removed.
This is my original post after finding about about the tumor in my chest:
I probably won't post this blog post... On Wednesday I got a call from the doctor saying that there is a small tissue mass that showed up on my chest x-ray. My next step is to get a CT scan.
I don't know what to think. I'm calm knowing God is in charge. I'm relieved knowing that 9 times out of ten it is nothing to worry about. I'm thankful I have so much love and support from my family. I am so glad we put money away in our flexible spending account. But I'm also sad. Sad that there is a possibility it could be bad news- that I could need surgery or worse that I might have cancer.
There is so many things running through my head. What if I die? What if I get really sick? Who will help take care of the children? Do I ask someone to move in with us? If I loose all my hair- I'll have to get some cool hats, maybe a wig cause I have a HUGE scar on the top of my head (this thought makes me laugh). Why didn't I schedule the CT scan for an earlier date!? Why don't I live closer to my mom? I miss my sisters. I wish someone was home to hold me while I cry. And worst of all- WHY the heck am I even worrying! I literally don't know if anything is even wrong! Ha- I'm such a worry wart. I inherited that from my mother ;) .
I know I have more to do. Here in this life. I know God has more he needs me to accomplish to help his Kingdom grow here on earth. I don't know, however, if that means I'll be completely healthy doing it. Maybe something I have to endure is cancer. If so, then ok, God knows what is best. I trust him. All my other worries will be addressed and everything will work out. Trusting in the Lord brings unimaginable peace.
5 comments:
Praying for you, Kendra!! :)
oh..wow. What a scare. I pray and hope it is not cancerous. I will keep you in my prayers.
Kendra, how did it all turn out? I am so sorry...so sorry that I haven't been a blog checker in a while. And know that I will help and be there whenever you need it. From a hug to watching the kids to a meal. I'm here...and don't ever forget it!
Wow, all of those questions. You put it so poignantly. I'm glad, reading this weeks after, that it is very likely not cancer. Why do you have a scar on top of your head?
Scar on top of my head- ??? I have no idea, it happened when I was really little and my parents don't know either. I've had it since I can remember, but it is about 2 inches long and my head is dented in along the whole scar.
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